Can you believe that you were born four years ago already?
I find it hard to believe that we have been that long without you. Yet I can hardly remember the time that came before you.
You should know that I have thought of you each and every day since I learned of your existence. I will continue to do so for as long as I can. You should also know that you live on.
You are the one who anchors me to the love of the present, with the knowledge that tomorrow is uncertain. You are the one who reminds me that looking forward is nowhere near as important as appreciating what is, right now. Tomorrow is full of promise. But one day, one of these tomorrows will mean losing something, or someone again, so I hold on to today for as long as I can.
Yes, my beautiful Anya, you are still alive in me, in how I approach life, and in how I love your mom, your brother William and sister Juliette.
Happy birthday, my eldest. I love you. I miss you. Thank you for all that you have given me.